Party Rockin’ in the Death Star Tonight (Unfortunately)

Firstly, here’s “Party Rock Cantina Band”, 100% guaranteed to be the only thing good ever associated with the band LMFAO:

This video is especially fun if after you’ve viewed it, you imagine a reality in which the band LMFAO are actually transported to the Mos Eisley Cantina, where their hideously garish outfits/hairdos immediately insult several of the locals and get them into a limb/head-amputating bar fight of some description.

Now, we’ll be the first to admit that we do some terrible things here in the Galactic Empire, like making all of our original Stormtroopers speak with a horrible bad Kiwi accent. [Emperor's Note: if you're going to grow 60,000 clones, do NOT choose their accent based solely on the fact that it will be funny hearing them say "Fush and Chups" (Fish and Chips) and "Sex" (Six).]

But one thing’s for certain: we’ve never done anything even 1/16 as bad as allowing the band LMFAO to exist, let alone be incredibly successful. The fact that a song featuring the lyrics, “Nonstop when we in the spot, booty movin’ weight like she on the block, / Where the drank? I gots to know, tight jeans, tattoo ’cause I’m rock ‘n’ roll” has had more than 450+ MILLION VIEWS ON YOUTUBE boggles the mind. What do those lyrics even mean? Did Yoda write that? Is it a riddle? Was somebody just having a stroke, or a mental breakdown, or a stroke while having a mental breakdown, and saying things and the band LMFAO decided to put it to music? Is it a riddle? This is one of life’s greatest mysteries, people.

And just when you think it’s bad enough that the band LMFAO exists, somebody plays “Party Rock Anthem” over the Death Star P.A. System and this happens:

Sigh. Stupid LMFAO. Stupid Stormtroopers. Luke’s Death Star trench run can’t come soon enough.

Thanks to Todd Reid for the tip.